Finding your style beyond fashion's rules

Our whole lives, we’ve been taught to appreciate clothes for what they can do to flatter our bodies. Why don’t we try loving our clothes for simply their style?

In 2019, there are more women than ever standing up and questioning the confines of fashion. Why must it be so exclusive, and exclusionary, when it’s something we all engage with every day?

Fashion is changing as we speak, and definitions of style are adapting with it.

It’s not about what’s flattering, slimming or ‘suits your shape’ – it’s about what makes you happy. It’s about clothes that you laugh in, love in and learn in, and not what they look like on your perfectly normal rolls.

One woman who knows this well is body positive fashion enthusiast, Fleur Turnbull. “I found my style over years of being told to wear clothes appropriate to my ‘body shape’, she says, “but one day I was out shopping and bought a yellow dungaree dress, and I’d never felt so liberated.”

“Not only did it brighten up my day but I had so many compliments too”, a result those of us with low self-confidence don’t tend to expect. Taking a new leap with fashion can often be frightening, but it’s absolutely worth the freedom on the other side, as Turnbull proves: “Ever since, I’ve only bought things that I want to wear.”

It can still be a struggle to find things that fit well, as she reminds us – “There are definitely clothes I would love to wear that I know there is nothing close to in the plus size industry, but I make do with what I have available.”

“It’s a shame but you have to think it’s their loss”, Turnbull advises, and suggests taking your money to brands that choose to include you as you’ll be happier spending money there.

But how do we find our own yellow dungaree dress moment?

“Fashion is meant to be fun and something everyone can experience”, says the enthusiast, “and experimenting is key.” Thought it will take a while to develop – just as all good things do – Turnbull has faith that you’ll find your true taste in fashion this way. “It takes time to find your style, but try things out and you’ll soon get there.”

In a recent post to social media, Abbie Walsh-Greenfield shared her thoughts on this journey also. “Over the course of the last year, I’ve started to find fashion liberating, and finding my own style has been a massive part in my self-love journey”, she shared. Recognising that lasting effects of a culture that doesn’t encourage fat fashion, she also acknowledged the way its rules can linger.

“Even I’m still conditioned to believe that some clothes aren’t meant for me”, the influencer said, “but they are. Clothes are made for bodies. The clothes I buy are made for me, if I so wish.” No one can define another’s style, and just what that should be, so isn’t it high time we got comfortable defining our own?

One way of doing this, Walsh-Greenfield says, is by saturating your personal media feeds with stylish bodies that look like your own. “To believe I can wear it, sometimes I need to see it on someone like me”, she says, stating “if that’s you, looking for someone to show you that you can, then here. Wear it – wear what you want, wear it because you can.”

Personal stylist and part-time fashion blogger, Katie Morton, agrees with this wholeheartedly, and sees that we’re headed in the right direction.

“I think the industry is changing everywhere and every day”, she says, sharing: “We are seeing more and more awesome brands become size inclusive, and not just to a size 20. It’s such a positive change for women since 67% of us are over a size 14.”

To match these changes in the industry, Morton wishes for something more. “I wish women who are plus size would understand our value as humans, and would treat themselves to trendy clothing items”, instead of feeling as though they must hide away.

The stylist also claims to know a great a place to start on this. “Wake up every day and look straight into the mirror and tell yourself how beautiful you are. Having the right mind-set about who you are is truly a life changer, and can change your whole perspective”

In addition, she advises we “seek help from stylists, whether on social media or in retail stores. Most bloggers are here to help you, and I know I always am!”

Style doesn’t have to be scary, or something reserved for the women of Parisian streets. It’s anyone and everyone’s, every day, at all times.

Be bold enough to take the chance at finding your own.